Why Do I Pee During Sex? And What To Do About It

It is normal for men and women to feel the need to pee during sexual activity. But if you have ever found yourself actually peeing during sex, that’s normal, too! We get that not many of you would be comfortable discussing intimate questions like “Why do I pee during sex?”. But finding their answers is important to dispel your doubts and give you the peace of mind you need.

Having frequent instances of leaking urine while having sex can indeed make one’s life stressful. Plus, having constant worry at the back of your mind when you’re trying to get intimate with your partner can negatively impact your libido and stop you from having a good time. If you wish to turn this around and regain control of your sexual life, there are ways to fix it. But first, let’s understand the causes behind what makes a woman pee during sex.

Why Do I Pee During Sex? Let’s Have A Look At The Causes

Generally, women are more likely to pee during sex than their male partners. Apart from a few men who are treated for prostate cancer, others do not face this problem. This is because a sphincter closes the bladder’s opening into the penis when they indulge in an intimate session. This is the body’s natural mechanism to stop urine from getting mixed with the semen during ejaculation. That’s why men usually do not experience any leaks during sex.

Then why is it that women find themselves dealing with this problem so often? Let’s check out the reasons:

Urinary Incontinence

This is the primary reason why many women (and some men!) pee during sex. Urinary incontinence is the uncontrolled and sudden release of urine. That means you will pee by accident and won’t be able to control its release. Close to 60% of women with urinary incontinence experience leakage while having sex, a study (1) has revealed. 

Based on the responsible factor for urine leaks, doctors classify urinary incontinence into three different types:

A. Stress Incontinence

This is the most prevalent type of urinary incontinence in women. No, it is not related to any kind of mental stress you might be dealing with, but it is connected to the physical stress that is exerted on the lower body. During penetration, all the thrusting puts significant pressure on your bladder. Those with weak pelvic floor muscles cannot handle the strong movements and tend to pee during sex.

B. Urge Incontinence

Leaking urine while you are having an orgasm is mostly related to urge incontinence. An overactive bladder is the culprit behind the urge to pee you feel when you have urge incontinence. When you hit orgasm, your bladder muscles experience spasms (which are involuntary contractions), due to which you suddenly and unknowingly release urine.

C. Mixed Incontinence

As the name suggests, when you have mixed urinary incontinence, you experience stress as well as urge incontinence. The degree of how much you’re affected by one over the other can vary. So, when you’re in the midst of the act, the stress put on your bladder, along with involuntary bladder spasms, can cause you to lose control over your bladder and make you pee during sex.

Other Causes Of Urinary Incontinence That Make You Pee During Sex

Urinary Tract Infections (UTIs)

You get a urinary tract infection when bacteria find their way to the urethra and manage to travel up the tube and get closer to the bladder. UTIs can irritate the bladder, create frequent urges to pee, and also lead to unintentional peeing.

Pelvic Organ Prolapse

Women with this condition have weak pelvic floor muscles, which are unable to hold pelvic organs like the uterus, bladder, or rectum in place(2). This causes these organs to drop down and pushes them into the vagina. As a result, protruded organs trigger urinary incontinence and can cause women to pee during sex.

Certain Medications

If you’re on medications such as diuretics, you may be more likely to leak urine while having sex. Diuretics trigger your body to make more urine by removing excess water from the body. It can substantially increase the number of times you visit the bathroom and can also make you pee while you’re enjoying sex with your partner.

Prevention And Self-Care Measures For Women Who Pee During Sex

Now that you have answers to the two most concerning questions, “Can you pee during sex?” and “Is it normal to pee during sex?” It’s time to take a look at the ways you can prevent urine leakage from happening during sex.

Bring Changes To Your Lifestyle

You can make several changes to your lifestyle to help reduce instances of or put a stop to urine leaks. Here’s what you can do:

• Try losing some weight if you fall into the overweight category.
• Break your habit of smoking if you have been doing it regularly.
• Take a break and go to the bathroom if you must. You can always resume sex later.
• Consume less fluids or, if possible, avoid fluids for a few hours before you have sex.
• Pee right before you do your deed so you won’t have to rush to the bathroom in between.
• Say no to coffee and alcohol, as they can act as diuretics, irritate your bladder, and lead to incontinence.

Try Using Lubrication

Using a lubricant during foreplay or intercourse can reduce the friction between the penis and vaginal walls, lowering irritation and the bladder’s receptiveness to stress. There are also remedies to increase natural female lubricants. This will, in turn, lead to fewer chances of peeing during sex.

Attempt Different Sexual Positions

Ditch the missionary position and experiment with other sexual positions that put less pressure on your bladder. Positions like ‘woman on top’ or rear-entry positions like spooning and chairman are good choices if you and your partner don’t want to have a pee encounter during sex. 

Or, if you’re feeling a little adventurous, you can take your love-making session under the shower. Even if you pee, it will wash off immediately under running water, and you won’t even notice anything!

Have An Open Discussion With Your Partner

One way to practice self-care is to talk about what’s on your mind so it stops bugging you continuously. If you have inhibitions regarding your tendency to pee during sex, an open and clear discussion with your partner can help. Telling your partner about leaks can help them understand why you have been avoiding sex lately. Your partner may be more than okay than what you think and can even support you to make you feel comfortable during your intimate sessions.

What Treatments Are Available For Those Who Pee During Sex?

If your instances of peeing during sex are bothering you and stopping you from living your best life, there is always an option to seek advice from your doctor. Make an appointment and let your provider know your problem. Don’t hesitate! Clear communication can help your doctor make a diagnosis and offer you advice and the best treatment possible. 

Here are some of the treatments you can expect to receive for the “Why do I pee during sex” problem.

Kegel Exercises

This is the first and foremost treatment option for urine leaks during sex. Because incontinence is associated with weakened pelvic floor muscles, your doctor will likely refer you to a pelvic floor physical therapist who will teach you the proper way to perform Kegel exercises. 

These discreet exercises are super effective if you pee during sex often, as they strengthen the pelvic muscles and minimize the chances of incontinence. Perform Kegels anytime, anywhere, without anyone noticing. 

Here’s how you can do it:

1. Choose any position you feel comfortable in. You can either sit, stand, or lie down.
2. Locate the muscles you will be training. Imagine you’re stopping to pee midway. The muscles you use to stop the flow are the ones you need to work on.
3. Now squeeze the identified muscles when performing the Kegel exercise and hold for five seconds. You can start with fewer seconds and later build it up to 5 seconds as you gain strength.
4. After five seconds are over, relax! Take another five seconds to settle down.
5. Repeat the exercise 10–20 times during each round of exercise. You can do as many as three to four rounds of Kegel exercises in a day.

Bladder Training

Along with Kegel exercises, your doctor may suggest bladder training. It involves training yourself to go to the bathroom at fixed intervals. Sure, you may feel the need to go during this fixed period, but it is possible to conquer this urge using relaxation techniques. 

As your ability to hold urine gets better, you may increase the time interval by 10-15 minutes and build up the gap between restroom visits to four hours.

Medications

For women who pee during sex and do not benefit as much from first-line treatments like Kegel exercises and bladder training, doctors may prescribe medications that manage the symptoms by reducing the occurrence of bladder spasms. 

Alternative treatments your doctor may suggest to stop you from peeing during sex are botox injections given into your bladder muscle or electrical stimulation.

Surgery

If exercises and medications fail to relieve you of the tension of peeing during sex, your doctor can suggest surgery as the final resort to treating this problem. Surgery for incontinence requires two to three weeks for full recovery and may even accompany some complications.

Through surgery, your doctor will provide extra support to your urinary tract or will reposition the bladder neck so you don’t experience any leakages going forward (3). Sometimes, surgery is also suggested to increase your bladder size so that it can hold more urine and reduce your trips to the toilet.

In Conclusion

Peeing while having sex is not as uncommon as you might think. So, in case you have been wondering, “Why do I feel like I have to pee during sex?” and “Am I the only one doing it?” then you need to chill because you’re not alone! 

While there may be underlying causes that are triggering your body to leak urine, rest assured that there are ways to handle this. Lifestyle changes and medical treatments are promising ways to reduce or stop the occurrence of this problem. 

Once controlled, you will start feeling like your normal self again and will be able to enjoy the moments of intimacy just the way you did before!

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